Some argue that It is inherent. And also Generational. The sins of the father upon the son, and thank you very much eve, you and Adam achieved a lasting impression on even the unimagined human in 3027. Well done.
Others argue that it is taught to us, part of the socialisation needed to maintain the balance in this mad house paradise of fools where we own everything by god. Literally.
Me, I don't care for the theories, the theologies. I know it very well.
Guilt.
I know you as intimately as a sweater underarm knows an arm pit. Yes. Our romance? began early and has lingered. Freeze the frames of the past and you will find that it stained my good actions and imprinted its stench on the body of work I offered as daily justification for my existence (though I advice you waste none of your present digging in the archives of past me. I certainly don’t. Plus you will not find me there, I am already risen.)
Your fingers wrapped about my throat, you coated my triumphant declarations so they came out as shaky whispers. Where I deserved to reflect back the stars, you turned my eyes to the ground and cast my shine in dust. Half stating myself, half hating myself, I apologised where I was not sorry, confessed where I felt no remorse, marched on the spot when I was already on the next train to the next thing . And still you were insatiable, master of disguises. I found you in places I created to escape you. Like my sanity, like my prayers, like my future.
So now you have to go.
This song is for you Guilt.
2 comments:
though I advice you waste none of your present digging in the archives of past me
I am defiantly ignoring your advice...digging with the clicker :)
Lovely ode to Herr Guilt.
This song speaks my heart. I need a breakup too but not from guilt: FEAR. Which leads to lethargy and other nasty habits.
Big up and thanks for sharing yourself with us. It SO helps.
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